I don't know why, but the other night as I was falling asleep I was struck with a thought.
I wonder how God feels about In-Vitro Fertilization and other fertility help methods.
I asked Tim, who was half asleep and only gave me a mumbled "I don't know. Ask me when I'm awake" answer. Then he perked up a bit and asked what brought that on. I told him I wasn't sure but I started thinking about Abraham and Sarah (who were Abram and Sarai at the time in Genesis 16.) Sarai had been unable to bear children and so she took matters into her own hands by having Abram sleep with her maidservant. This led to all sorts of issues. Later, Sarah ends up giving birth to Isaac in her early nineties (can you imagine! Although I guess people did live longer than we currently do, but still.)
In James 1:27 we are told, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." (emphasis added)
If a woman is having a difficult time becoming pregnant in the traditional sense (intercourse) and God tells us to care for orphans, is IVF wrong? Why do we become so desperate for the things we want that we will take matters into our own hands and play God?
I don't want to offend anyone because I don't know what it is like to have trouble conceiving and I can't imagine that pain. I guess having watched our friends, Matt and Jeana, go through the adoption process and over the past year ease and transition into a family of three after bringing Emma home from China...I have seen firsthand that it is possible to love a child not from your own body as if they were. Matt and Jeana's love for Emma is no different than mine and Tim's love for Noah and Eleanor.
I am not here to say if it is right or wrong. Because I don't know for sure - I'm not God so I can't say what He thinks when it is not in the Bible. These were just more of those thoughts hanging out in my head that made me stop to think. I know they can open a whole can of worms that lead to all sorts of other questions as well, and if you have any, I would love to hear them. Our small group likes to debate and discuss these kind of tough questions and we're not always all on the same page with our beliefs on them either.
Thoughts?
5 comments:
It is good to see someone else ask this question, as I have also wondered. People are quick to condemn abortion, yet, couldn't the same argument be made about in-vitro? Playing God is playing God no matter which direction you play in. Just a thought. I also, don't want to offend and I know it is hard for a lot of people who want children and can't have them. I don't think we can have them, but adoption would be my first choice anyway, so I'm not worried about it. I would much rather save a child! What an awesome opportunity!
That's a tough one. I think it comes down to the conversations you have with God about it. I would never condemn anyone who's had it or are thinking of the procedure, but I wouldn't do it myself...and I'm not saying this because I think I'm better or stronger. There was a time in my life when we did struggle with infertility and the pain that comes with it is unbearable. But I did tell God that if He won't give us biological children than I will still love and whorship Him just the same (go figure, a month after that conversation with Him I got pregnant).
I do belive that ALL children are from God. He DID plan each and one of us before the earth was even created. I have a hard time believing that the children concieved through IVF weren't in His plan and didn't bring Him delight when they were concieved. It might have hurt Him that the parents wouldn't wait for His timing, but we won't know for sure. With any issue, when we try and take things into our own hands (including adoption!), even when God shows us favor, doesn't mean that it was the best possible route we could have taken. If we wait on Him, His blessings are abundant and whole.
Sometimes I do have to remind myself that if God didn't want IVF's to work for certain people, it WOULDN'T. Know what I mean?
And you're right, this DOES open a whole can of worms, such as "I'm not going to take depression (or whatever sickness) medication because I have faith God will heal me." Get where I'm going with this? I don't think God want us to be stubborn, naive, ignorant, and test Him in ways like we're 6th graders. If He opens a door, you enter it. If He closes it, there's no reason you need to look for windows to jump through.
Which brings me back to the first sentence I typed: It's a matter between you and God.
I think a life is a life no matter which way it came about. That person exists as a part of God's plan. To take them out of it (ie. abortion) is a totally different story.
Most people who go through IVF have experienced a great deal of pain and hurt trying to grow their family and I really don't blame them one bit for trying everything within their means. Going down the IVF path is not easy, and most sane people choose it as a last resort and with great contemplation and prayer. It's not something people do on a whim.
I've never had IVF, but we did struggle with fertility and eventually turned to drugs. We might have been able to get pregnant without them... but it would have taken many years if ever. My doctor did not give me a very hopeful diagnosis. So obviously I have strong opinions about this after going through all that.
I don't think I stepped outside of God's will for our life... at ALL! I prayed and prayed for the right answer for us, and after 3 years off the pill... well... it probably wouldn't have happened for us without those drugs. My twin girls are clomid babies, and they are most CERTAINLY a part of God's will for my life. Without a doubt!
Plus, I think God gave us our intelligence for a reason. Medicine exists under God's will in my opinion. If we are dying of cancer do we ask, "Should we seek treatment? Should I do chemo? Am I sure that's God's will for my life?" No, we don't. We get the chemo, we go through with surgery, we do whatever the doctors tell us to do. So why is infertility any different??? There ARE treatments, so why do some Christians think that getting them is somehow stepping outside God's will? Isn't it also possible that those treatments exist as part of His plan for us???
Adoption isn't for everyone. And there are lots of ways to help widows and orphans besides bringing them into your family... Obviously that's some people's calling, but it's not everyone's.
Great comments. I do want to add real quick that I agree 100% that every child, every life, is loved by and created by the Lord and not one is ignored by Him.
I have to agree, Daniella, that if IVFs don't work for some, it might be due to the Lord.
I find it interesting the amount of people who have trouble conceiving and start the adoption process only to find themselves pregnant soon after. I currently know three in this situation.
Like I said in the post, I don't know how God feels on the issue of IVF since the Bible doesn't say, I just wanted to bring up some tough issues to chew on.
MommyAmy - congrats on your twin girls. I was checking out your blog; love their names. =) I do know people who have turned down chemo so I can't agree completely with your statement, although I understand where you're coming from and have to admit that I, personally, would probably choose chemo as an attempt to stay alive for my family. I also know people who have rejected the chemo and/or radiation believing God would provide a miracle of healing and He did.
Anyone have another tough question to throw out?
Andrea, I like that you're not afraid to start a discussion...On the flip side of this discussion...Is it okay to STOP having babies? Most people today, including many Christians, don't think twice about taking birth control or getting a vasectomy/tubal ligation. Essentially, we're talking about trusting God to provide the right number of kids for our families, right? Whether you're having fertility problems and are dying to conceive, or if you're very fertile and want to say enough is enough. (Like four kids in four years - HA!) I don't have a firm opinion about this, but I've been praying for God to give my husband a strong conviction about it.
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