Tim's meeting yesterday did not go as we thought, BUT it was a very clear closed door and obvious answer to prayer. Aaron (the guy he met with) would like to hire him on as permanent full time but can't past the house they start next week because he doesn't have work lined up after that. He works with 10 builders and, with our present economy, none of his builders are building right now. There is a second part to it as well in that to put Tim in the position he wanted to, he would have to let go of the guy who is there now. This was already an ucomfortable feeling for Tim because he knows the guy from college and Aaron does as well. Aaron is going to be talking to the guy this week to find out if he's serious about staying on and if he can maybe start working a little harder.
Talk about a closed door.
Now this is where it gets really interesting for both Tim and myself. We felt nothing but peace after finding all this out. When Tim told me on the phone what happened, at any other time in my life I would have started crying, hyperventilating, freaking out and stressing about how we're going to survive. Instead I got off the phone with him and said, "Ok, God. You know. I don't. You have always provided, and I know You will continue to, so we'll see how You are going to work in this." I didn't rush to the computer to check out jobs online or call a friend (or my mom) and vent about everything.
I just started trusting Him. After all, Tim has work. That in itself is amazing - especially in his line of work and the fact this is Michigan. As he and I talked last night we realized that with the crew he has been with for the past year, they have 3 houses lined up starting in February. That should carry them through to May. Tim has had two former clients whose interiors he painted for side jobs call him in the past couple weeks and want him to paint the exteriors of their houses this summer. So, really, he has work provided through the summer. He and a couple of the other guys are going to sit down again with the "boss" and talk numbers because the $5/hour paycut won't work for any of them since they all have families to provide for, but maybe they can meet somewhere in the middle.
I don't say this to brag "look how good a Christian I am because I don't worry" because I do struggle with worry. I worry about everything from Tim getting in an accident on his way to and from work. I worry about my kids: are they developmentally where they should be? Why isn't Ellie crawling yet? Is Noah being nice to kids at preschool? Are kids being nice to him? I worry about myself: is this tightness in my chest a heart attack or just anxiety? If I eat this cookie dough am I a failure?
I tell you this to show that God can grow us! He does grow us. I've never in my life been able to respond to any financial or job situation without severe anxiety attacks and tears. Yet yesterday, I felt His peace - truly felt it and was calmed because I took my worries and gave them to Him. All I can do is live today moment by moment knowing that He holds my tomorrows.
And if I can do it, anyone can so there is hope for all of us worriers yet.
7 comments:
Thank you for sharing, Andrea! It's so easy to worry, especially as wives/mommies, and to forget that God knows the bigger picture! I often have to remind myself that God loves Luke and my kids even more than I do, so of course He'll do what's best for them. (I, too, tend to worry about Luke's safety on the roads, etc, etc.) Anyway, thanks for sharing your victory! I appreciate your transparency!
you are from Grand Rapids?! I grew up there!!! crazy :)
PS. I found your blog from Daniella's site!
M.
Stopping in from SITS! Great blog!
I know many people say that women such as Angie Smith and Beth Moore, etc. are their inspiration.
Darling, I'm proud and honored to say that you are mine. Simply being around you (I wish we lived closer...) brings about a sense of peace. Reading your blog inspires me. To be able to humble yourself (like you did) and admit that you ARE afraid and anxious, but at the same time ruthlessly trust Him in the midst of it, is a honorable thing to do. He's eatin' it up!
Thank you so much for visiting my Blog today & Laughing with me.
Come back anytime.
what a great story....it is sooo hard..but so worth to just give it over....Sharing the SITS love with you
Wow. I cant help but feel deja vu when I read about the situation with the Aaron's Co. It reminds me of something that happened when Randy was thinking of going back to work for him for a time. Well! We can attest to the fact that the obvious closed door is actually a blessing like you said. Now you know...even if it doesn't give you a clear cut view of the future at this moment. Its good to hear that the potential for consistent work is still there though, even though it's still not easy.
"Those that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength, they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not be weary, they will walk led not faint:....God will direct your way!
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